Feel you have lost your voice? And I don’t mean laryngitis…
A voice, meaning, the ability to express yourself without judgment, having a say, not only saying – but being heard. Does being repressed, start by someone else’s doing, but then escalate by our own fulfilling of, hushing ourselves? I’m not pulling the word def this time; just look at that last word; re + pressed; something pressed down over and over … Is it possible re-pressed leads to de-pressed? Repressed voice equals repressed feelings; I think it’s quite possible.
Losing your voice, or an inability to speak or speak up for, yourself, can culminate within any relationship: a partner, a boss, a family member, a friend. So if you have a person in your life, and they are hardwired for pretty much, “My way or the highway” or “When I want your opinion I will give it to you”… so here goes.
Words are sounds, sounds are energy, words can be a powerful form of energy, misused as a means to manipulate a person. Words might carry less meaning, when one’s actions do not match what words have been spoken. And one of the most magical warning signs, of a manipulative person, might be – the word sorry. The classic get out of jail free card; all is forgiven, clean slate, and in the blink of an eye, the next meaningless sorry comes around the corner. They might only appear to admit fault, giving the false impression they are willing to change, in order to lower your guard, and keep you in a position of being submissive.
Now forgiveness is a great gift http://wp.me/p8i0zv-1Z, but if all is forgiven too soon, it can inadvertently condone further abuse from a person. Sometimes, there may be no choice, but to make yourself completely unavailable to a person, whom lacks either the compassion, conscience, or intelligence to realize they are taking you completely for granted. What it boils down to, is YOU have a choice. You have a voice. If someone yells at you or bully’s you, you do not necessarily have to yell back, you simply have to speak, or, leave. Ever heard the phrase, detach yourself form the energy of which is no longer serving you? You have now …
Is it hard for you to hear friends telling you, you need to stand your ground more? You need to grow a thick skin? Yenh, we have all had the pep talks, but if they don’t come to us at the right time, they tend to sound cynical, though the intentions are to bolster your confidence and well-being. So I found a great little article, and ways to be in “control” of ourselves as a way to be more in control, with respect to healthy relationships. Yes, having boundaries (standards) is a part of it.
Although the article, comes from the obvious ideal of love relationships, I believe the concepts are transferable, and that by following those steps, you may start to look at many relationships in a different light.
Is there someone you feel you do not have a voice with? Is there a grave difference between speaking your mind to them, versus the minimal that you say to them?
Be well, have a Voice, and Heal